Archive of Marcia's Musings October 25-31, 2004Too Full of Thoughts
So many things to think about, so little I can do about them. The first thought? Well, you see . . . the corporate train of thought is that someone who speaks Portuguese by birth would be a better negotiator for the Brasilian office. Fortunately, my management (Lee) and I (of course) disagree-- they speak English in Brasil and don't need someone who speaks Portuguese but they do need someone who knows the business down there, i.e., ME. Twice in the last three months, there has been a move to put a negotiator in California "in charge" of Brasil-- I could keep the rest of South America which is, coincidentally, run out of the Brasilian office (how generous, eh?). Twice they have been shot down and now they have finally conceded to the fact that I am, in fact, the best resource for the group there since I am familiar with them and they like me and vice versa.
Well, DUH!!
This California negotiator has made it her new assignment to question my every move; I can only assume that her goal is to show that I am incompetent, thus beating me out of the job ultimately. Sorry, ain't gonna work. Why? Because I am now the Department Dinosaur and yes, dinosaurs are extinct but believe me, there ain't no Big Bang gonna be getting me out of the operation.
Earlier this week, I wrote Lee an email informing her of my competitor's latest . . . shenanigans, i.e., she calls to ask me "What were you thinking when you wrote this contract?" Like I have a responsibility to her to justify my actions.
Here's part of the email:
I am now the “oldest” living member of the Contracts Department. I started working here in December of 1999 when the stock price was HIGH (over $75) and here when the only stock split occurred (January of 2000). I was here when we were riding the Dot Com High ($160/Share) and the Dot Bomb Low ($16/Share).Today, I'm going to have a conversation with Lee that basically requests her to intervene with the manager for this negotiator to get her to back-off and realize that there is nothing she can do to change my status-- I work here and will be working here for as long as I choose to do so. She will not get my job or my region until such time as I choose to leave because I have done nothing that would require me to "leave the company" under less desirable circumstances.Over the past several weeks, I have had at least two phone calls from other members of the Contracts Department, lesser in time in the Department, of course, asking me the age old question: “What were you thinking?” The question was related to a particular deal or document that had been put together with terms that we would no longer consider doing today.
So the answer comes to mind:
What I was thinking:
1. I want the company to succeed even though the language is a little squirrelly, it’ll bring the deal in and we’ll deal with the fall-out on the next purchase (a common practice that was relayed to me (and the other contract negotiators) from time to time by finance and operations folks who were nervous about the numbers call after the quarter end).
2. My AVP is “My Boss” to a degree and if he is willing to commit to an approval of the exception in an email, I will change the language to accommodate the customer’s request “to bring the deal in”.
3. Think? I was allowed to think? For at least the first three years of my employment with Mercury, I wasn’t “allowed” to think—I was told time and again that I wasn’t capable of thinking. To this day, I find myself apologizing for being innovative or creative enough to come up with a concept that’ll help the Department. I’m beginning to un-learn the Pavlovian concepts that were beating me down for years.
Gee, and that was only my first thought!!
Next Thought . . . politics. I usually stay very low key on the topic on this page. I don't like to force my opinions (and they are just my opinions) on anyone else for a variety of reasons but mostly because we are each entitled to our own.
While it may seem unrelated, a part of this is the fact that my brother's wife (did you even know I have a brother?) and I are on the same team. I have one sister who I know is Republican and the other I'm not sure about but I think she leans toward being a Republican (there is another sister that I don't talk about either but that's another story for another time).
"Lily", my brother's wife (more on that below), sent out an email a few weeks ago asking for support for the Kerry/Edwards team-- I wrote back to her that she was preaching to the choir at my end of the church-- I was already there.
What I dislike is a person who votes Republican because they don't like abortion and gay marriage. Ya know what? There are people getting killed in Iraq for our current President!! Why aren't these folks also against that kind of death?? Gay marriage? Who cares? Its not for us to judge, remember?
Don't NOT vote for Kerry/Edwards because of those two issues-- find something more important to dislike about them than that!! The current President has gotten us into a war that was actually started 10 days after he took office, not after 9/11. Has anyone asked the really BIG question: What happened to Bin Laden??? That's who hit us with those planes on 9/11-- not Saddam Hussein!!!
Okay, that's all I'm going to say about that topic-- is that enough controversy for one day? No, I don't think so either-- I'm going to continue ranting here for a few minutes and then not post for the weekend (so I can sew like a crazy person) and you'll be sick of reading my page anyway.
My Family
You've heard me talk about my sisters, Karen and Sue. You know that I am the webmaster for my sister Sue's website and that Karen has come to visit me. What about the Mystery Siblings?
Mystery Sibling #1 is a brother that we'll call "David" for purposes of this writing. David doesn't like me because he thinks I'm ingratiating and narcissistic (note with interest that I have to go to the dictionary to spell that last word correctly!). You know why David thinks that? Because of two reasons: 1) I try to help people, specifically, our other sister (Sue) and 2) because I'm "self-involved".
Now to respond to both of those accusations, I say this:
1) If I were ingratiating to someone, don't you think I would be smart enough to ingratiate myself to someone who could "repay" my generosity? Let's be real: Sue cannot afford to repay me for anything I do for her and, frankly, I don't want her to repay me. Helping her isn't what's going to get me beyond this earth-- it doesn't work that way. In my opinion, God doesn't let people into heaven simply for their good works. Obviously, this blows his theory out of the water on that one.
2) I'm narcissistic?? Okay, he is basing my "self-involvement" on the fact that when Brian and I went to Michigan a few years ago, we didn't make time to see them. First, we didn't make time for him and Lily (which I missed a lot-- I like her!) because it was after he had yelled at me about being ingratiating and narcissistic-- why would I want to spend time with him? Another DUH!!
Self-involvement means that you don't make time for anyone outside of your little world and (to stretch the meaning a little more) don't make any effort to be with family . . . gee, that sounds really familiar, doesn't it? Oh, yeah-- that's David!!!
Mystery Sibling #2 is a sister that I have that lives in Maine. She and I have never gotten along-- not even as children. There were a couple of times that we were able to build relationships but they didn't last long since they were destroyed by the actions of one or the other of us. Of course, I have my opinions and, I'm sure, she has her opinions about who destroyed what but, at least I don't cut myself off from the rest of the family (except for David) and I reach out to those in the family without limiting their topics of discussion, etc.
Okay, enough of that-- I'm working up a sweat just thinking about this stuff. Obviously, I've been thinking a lot about these things lately for one reason or another but mostly because of the email that Lily sent to me about Kerry/Edwards. I wrote back to her and asked why I only hear from her when its politics. We started a conversation, which was very pleasant. I could be friends with her if she weren't married to David-- I really could!
Can you pity the negotiator on the other side of the table today?
Okay, I'm going to go get ready to work from home today. Maybe I'll surprise you and come back by here later or over the weekend.
Thanks for listening-- hope you enjoyed. Take care and have a good day!
Wednesday, October 27, 2004Slow News Day
There is really not much happening but let's see what'll ramble out of my brain . . . well, I finished a t-shirt tonight with a tropical fish scene on it. The t-shirt itself is lime green and the "picture" is pretty even if it did get a little off alignment. Unless you look closely, or know how it is supposed to be, you can't see it. Two down and _____ to go-- I have't decided how many I'm going to make. I'm trying to use some of the embellishment buttons I bought in Brasil in the designs so I'm choosing designs based on those buttons.
Speaking of which, I haven't ever gotten ALL of the stuff that I bought when Marli was here put away. I've gotta straighten up my fabric room this weekend-- Yeesh! I can find stuff but it is crowded on the table top!!
I'm just about finished with my mother-in-law's "top" with only another couple of days' work to go on that-- by this weekend, I'll be quilting that and my sister-in-law's gift!!
Molly Watch
For those of you on the watch for Molly's page, I am looking at photos and deciding which ones to use and how to lay it out. She's getting really good at learning how to give kisses-- that's so much fun! When I get home at night from work, Lucy climbs up my legs and Molly "pronks" around in front of me-- jumping high with her front paw "fingers" spread in glee! It is so much fun to come home!!
Thanks for stopping by but I think that's for it tonight-- I did a pretty good job of rambling here, didn't I? I thought so . . . have a good evening.
Tuesday, October 26, 2004There I Go Again!!
Well, for good reason this time: I've been busy sewing and embroidering and quilting and generally, getting ready for Christmas. I'm also making t-shirts for myself-- no, I'm not completely making the t-shirts but I am running designs on t-shirts for myself. I haven't been buying t-shirts while on vacation or traveling on business sooooo, I've started to wear through the ones I have and, as a result, need some new ones. I'm also going to be running some designs on some denim dresses and jumpers that I have so that they're a little more decorative-- if ya got the machine (and I do), ya might as well use it!!
Thoughts
Lee lost her brother to cancer on Sunday; she's not doing great but she's a trooper. He had a long and tough battle with prostate cancer but he lived 3-1/2 years longer than he was expected to live so, for that, they are grateful. Think about her and send her happy, positive thoughts, okay? Thanks.
Change of Routine
I am probably the worst when it comes to wearing make-up and moisturizer and doing my hair. If I can get away with it in the morning, I won't do it-- so, I've been letting myself get away with it . . . all summer. Now, however, as you know, Fall is upon us and, thus, we have a change of season. No excuse not to dry my hair and style it and wear the appropriate layers of make-up... even though I really don't like to bother with it. Generally speaking, its only four days a week but man, I can't wait for my vacation in a few weeks!! ;>)
That's it for tonight-- thanks for stopping by and have a great one, okay?
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